I am lucky to have four amazing kids call me mommy. Being a mother can not be explained the intensity of your feelings and emotions can only be felt, it starts when you first find out you are pregnant the feeling of knowing you are no longer one, that you are creating another life, the reality is overwhelming when you see the first ultra sound and that little peanut on the screen, hearing the first heartbeat and the first little flutters, it is exciting and scary all at the same time, Being a mom means that you are no longer responsible for just your life but the life of someone else as well, it brings with it challenges, doubts, confusion and most importantly incredible rewards. I love my mom she is a true role model and the person I go to when I need to vent, to share joy and to help with problem solving she is always there even if she may not agree with my decisions she supports me and loves me unconditionally ( which at times must have been incredibly difficult considering how much of an attitude I have). Until I had children of my own I did not understand the intensity of her love for me, how even after I left home and was married and starting my own family, how she continues to worry about me, how she will continue to worry about me always. When I pictured my life and what kind of mom I was going to be I could not have imagined the reality of what it actually means to be a mom, Before we have kids we have a certain image in our minds, we think we will be so much better than other moms and that our kids will be the first ever kids in the history of the world to listen, and not talk back, and they absolutely will not throw a temper tantrum in a public place. ;) ok maybe that was just me dreaming, then we become mothers and the rose coloured glasses come off and the reality sets in and it’s no where near as glamorous as the dream. To often in life we judge other moms choices and their parenting styles and we forget that each child is different each mother is different and we all face our own unique challenges, We need to embrace the differences and take joy in the things that only a mother can relate to. There are some things that are universal about being a mom.
- We all go through life not having a clue what we are doing, we learn as we go and adjust according to what life throws at us, and just when we think we’ve got it all figured out it goes and changes on us. We are not experts we will make mistakes and we will sometimes regret a decision we have made, but we go on and we become better moms and people because of it.
- We all eventually end up quoting our mothers, and will at some point in time apologize and thank our mothers for all of their hard work and for what little brats we must have been.
- We learn just how valuable and precious time is, once you have a child time will never seem the same again, they grow so quick and can change so much in such a short time. It all seems long when we are sleep deprived and walking the floors but then we blink and they are off to kindergarten and just like that we have passed into a new stage in life.
- You have never before felt so much joy at someone else's accomplishments or pain at their struggles. We cherish the good and painfully feel their failures.
- You will never again make a decision without thinking of how it will impact your family. NEVER !! From having to figure out babysitting, to planning vacations, to the simple and mundane act of grocery shopping.
- We can not do it all , something has to give, you can not work full time either at home or out of the home, keep a house clean, give your kids and husbands the attention they need and still find time for yourself. We always feel like we are dropping the ball on something, and that at any moment the careful balancing act we have created is going to come crashing down, at some point we all feel like we can not keep up.
- We all yell and lose your shit, it’s just a fact of life, no matter how many parenting books you read or how determined you are to raise a child in a calming environment, without raising your voice or losing your mind, You will one day full out from the bottom of your gut do a mommy roar, it may be because of safety issues, or the fact that you have just listened to two kids fighting in the back seat over something as silly as a pack of stickers and just wanted it to stop ( yah that may be a true story) it’s ok it doesn’t make you a bad parent it makes you human, take a breath and move on.
- We all CRY, Take stock in tissues one thing is guaranteed when you're a mom you cry over everything, from the minute they first enter the world to their first boo boo, when they first start daycare, then kindergarten then college, get married and have kids of their own we cry.
- We never stop being a mom :) We will always from this day forward walk around with a part of us out there, and our love will always follow them no matter where they may be.
Thats me for today puzzling through life, in love with my kids and being a mom, and thanking all moms for everything that they do on this day and always.
J.
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